Struggling to have a fantastic time at university? You are not the only one.
Robert Medhurst passed the majority of his orientation week browsing through social media, viewing updates about other students' fun nights out.
"I was just in bed," Robert recalls, depicting those days as the loneliest time of his life.
Robert's flatmates didn't go out much, and his program didn't seem particularly social.
Although he tried by participating in sample activities for different clubs, he was unable to locate like-minded individuals.
"I began losing my self-esteem," he says. "I felt like people didn't want to form friendships with me, or they weren't fond of me."
Digital Platform Contrasts
Initially, Robert didn't plan of attending college and received employment offers for after sixth form.
Yet he saw his friends having great fun as college students online.
"When you've got to get up for work on Thursday at 9:00 and you observe peers partied on the previous evening, you do start thinking situations appear superior," Robert says.
University Expectations
TV shows and social media can glorify the idea of university living.
Numerous students begin university with high expectations for what they believe could be the best years of their lives.
Certain attendees begin their studies with "rose-tinted glasses," explains a support services coordinator.
Research Results
- In a poll of new students initially, students' biggest concern was fitting in and being accepted
- In another survey through polling organizations, 17% of students said they lacked friendships at university
- A substantial portion mentioned they felt anxious regularly about forming friendships
Personal Journeys
Alisha Miah's TikTok feed was filled with content of girls having fun while sharing accommodation in university housing.
However when she relocated from London to Sheffield to learn reporting, she found orientation period "daunting" because of how much alcohol it involved.
She avoids drinking and had avoided party scenes before.
"I utilized considerable time initially in my room," she says. "I just felt slightly disconnected."
Mental Health Considerations
According to recent research of numerous undergraduate students, nearly one-third reported they had considered leaving university.
The primary factor was their mental and emotional health, accompanied by financial concerns.
"Concern over these multiple factors is massively common, and expected," notes a mental health professional.
Finding Solutions
Eventually, Robert, Alisha and Christina eventually adapted and formed relationships.
She built connections during classes and through TikTok, while another student became more content when she could to move in with friends.
Practical Advice
In his case, now 24 and in his last year, it was joining his university's drama society and getting a part-time job that supported social connection.
Robert's advice to first-year students experiencing connection challenges is to just "get out of your room" and participate in group trial sessions.
"Following several weeks of continuous participation, others notice your presence," he mentions, "you recognise theirs, and relationships start developing."
